Having recently returned to the tundra from sunny and drenched Florida, As usual I fell into my usual questioning… Why did I come back? Granted, my end of Florida is a poorly disguised swamp, with just a few days heavy rain leaving water lapping at the industrial strength air conditioner my mom laid out the big bucks for. The place smelled of swamped sewer system for a bit, and thought the bought and paid for by the developers Naples News won’t fess up to it, there was flooding.
So I drove home on dry roads to this:
Actually, that’s an improvement! Thanks to the 500 feet of snow fence I’d scattered about the periphery of my acre or so, the snowdrift tall as me had assembled itself a hundred feet upwind rather than across my driveway. This picture was taken during monday’s blizzard, and the barely visible trees are 200 feet away… That’s a mild blizzard, I’ve got pictures where you can barely make out the mailbox 50 feet away! And to deal with what the snow fence couldn’t, a bit of redneck snow control:
Noting that snowdrifts tend to give parked vehicles a bit of space, I simply hooked up the pickup and 6 by 12 trailer and parked them where the drift was usually deepest. So I start up the pickup and almost pull right out and leave 35 feet of clear driveway in a minute. But the trailer wheels stick out a foot or so on each side thus adding a lot of snow drag, so had to unhook from the trailer, make some ruts with the 4 by 4 Ranger, then hook back up and drag the whole mess with a couple feet of snow atop over to the drainfield mound, where it’s insulating qualities may be needed.
Now the Ranger’s underside neatly trims the snow depth down to a foot or so, and a bit of back and forth rut making neatly breaks up the compacted snow. This still leaves me the work of shoveling a Golf wide swath that foot deep and a hundred feet long to the street. Now I left Florida with a sore knee from getting out of bed wrong or something, I don’t know, I did my business and fell back to sleep. After shoveling out that driveway a time and a half (had a couple inches more snow and blizzard winds), damn near every joint I own aches.
This brings me to my annual reckoning… Should I stay in Florida all winter? I look at the FEMA flood maps again, remember that the “campground” I abode in uses a series of “kited” equity loans for operating capital and to pay for the late owners wife’s condo on the beach, and then the Naples News runs an article on how the county wants to “encourage” development in the surrounding swamp. “Development” means hauling in several feet of fill to get the new town homes and strip malls and attendant parking lots and roads above the FEMA hundred year flood plain, which means deeper water in my little trailer park that sits a couple feet lower.
But you can ride all year… With the exception of summer days when heat stroke is a real threat. And where to… Florida now having passed New York in population, it’s like one big long suburb from Key West north. There’s some beautiful places and great cultures like the Everglades and Caribbean food and music… But the road into the Everglades is lightly traveled and the locals warn me to stay out of Miami, probably because they listen to Faux News instead of slowly tuning the dial for music from the Caribbean.
So having again decided to “brave” a few more Minnesnowtah winters, my aching body told me it was time to acquire some snow moving power tools. Adding a plow to the Ranger sounded easy, but it won’t handle deep compacted drifts, and do I want to bet $3000 that a 19 year old pickup in the rustbelt has many years of structural integrity left? It won’t mow either, and neither will a “throwaway” snowblower. So I decided it was time to call the Kubota dealer and a tell them I’m ready for that tractor we talked about last fall.
That was two days and another inch of snow ago, and I still haven’t called the Kubota dealer. Got the Ranger insured so I can go drift busting on the streets again, this snow is too much fun! Even had visions of snowmobiling for a minute, but ATVs are more versatile, and don’t Arctic Cat sell a three point hitch for theirs? Supposed to warm up next week, maybe I should move the hack’d Super Tenere up by the door?
But if I see a marked down snow blower at Costco tomorrow, I’ll probably bring it home…
LMFAO…!!!
Sorry, but that was hilarious…you poor thing… the redneck snowplow is a great idea…now if you just put a lift kit on the truck taller rims on the trailer… loL!
I grew up in PA in the ‘60s-‘70s…i have strong memories of snows like this…
I have been in FL. 20 years now…I abhor the horror show that is “Da 305”…but I love the sun, water and open shoes damn near year round….the fishing and diving is not bad either.
And I have to say that if (WHEN) i sprint from MIAMI-DADE…while I used to think it would be to TN or NC….I now am not so sure. There actually still ARE quite a lot of nice, scenic calm, pastoral, pleasant, rural areas in Central and N. Florida. I am now thinking more and more about Sarasota area or St. Augustine area (actually going to check that out seriously in next few months) or perhaps Ocala if I select to be more inland.
As for your choice to go north at this time of year…I can only say…WTF..?! ;-))
You are doing it all backwards…even the birds and animal know better… 😉
DO NOT invest in new snow equipment… Come back down here next winter and stay THE WHOLE WINTER and look around a bit for a non-swampy camp. They do exist. I like Chiefland a lot…up by the Suwanee river.
You drove for UPS I believe you said…you have done your time in snow and ice and nasty roadways and bundling up and DARKNESS…
I’ll tell you honestly…aside from cold, and snow etc,…the thing I dont’ think I can handle anymore up north is the DARKNESS…it’s so good for your soul to have all that SUNSHINE… (truly) ;-))
I send you some now …. along with a little Jimmy Buffet drifting through your mind and a parrot calling in the distance and the palm trees gently rustling as you sip your rum drink…
but I digress…
get back out there and shovel some snow!
😉
Best, Chris
chrischarles1@mac.com
’77 R100RS ’76 R90S ’90 R100GS-PD
ABC # 14417
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Well, much of south florida has real trouble with rising sea levels. I would be careful.
What was once 25 year flooding is now monthly.
Pat, sounds like you’ve been hittin’ the environmentalist koolaid kinda too hard. I looked up some sea level gauges in south Florida a couple months ago, looking especially for gauges that had records going back from before the development of south Florida. I found a gauge record at Key West that goes back for over a century, and several others in South Florida that go back to the 40s, 50s, and 60s. They show sea level rise, but on the order of 100 millimeters a century rather than the meter or more predicted by the environmentalists. The graph of sea level rise looks pretty linear, not the rapidly rising curve that global warming theorists would predict.
This does not disprove global warming and the theory of resulting sea level rise, though. Looking at recording stations further west in the gulf along the Mississippi delta, one sees real sea level rise, probably partly caused by the softer soil of the delta gradually sinking. On the Atlantic coast, flooding is becoming more common in seaside cities from Virginia north. The science behind this is pretty simple- “water level” ain’t necessarily level. The iceberg that calves off a glacier in greenland is going to take a while to melt and make it’s way to the gulf, and it could be that we’ll thus have sea levels ride as predicted in south Florida in the future. Or maybe the delta will sink more and absorb that melt water…
One of the best ways of assessing flood risk is to just observe the geography, former Fargo mayor Denny Wallander found he could do better than the Corps’ flood forecasts just by driving around upriver and observing how the snow melt was proceeding. Add in some history, and you can pretty well assess the risk. South Florida is pretty much a swamp, with the exception of some low sand ridges built up along the beaches. It’s flatter than the Red River valley, my place is 10 miles inland and only 10 feet above sea level, and that’s pretty typical. South Florida is known for heavy rains, especially in the summer when day after day drenchings measured in inches are not unusual. Neighbors tell me that when our trailer park was built 25 years ago, heavy rains had water lapping at the slab of what is now the park’s headquarters building, and that’s the highest point in the park. That’s nothing- a staffer at the county museum in Imokalee, 40 miles inland and 28 feet above sea level, tells me that the storm surge from Hurricane Donna in 1960 pushed sea water all the way up there! This winter’s rainstorms that dumped 6 inches or so of rain over a couple of days flooded several roads that were purportedly built over the 100 year flood line and blew out the neighboring trailer park’s sewer system. Over 80% of the county (Collier) is in floodplain according to FEMA, so all new development needs to built atop several feet of fill. I looked up the required floodplain survey certificates for the trailer park across the road from mine, and they had to put four courses of blocks under the new trailers to get them above the hundred year flood line. They’re at about the same 10 feet above sea level we are, and 13 feet seems to be the magic number… The bottom of the joists on my trailer are at about 11 feet, you can do the maths…
It gets worse- those FEMA flood plain maps are already out of date, as more of this vast swamp is filled with hard surfaces and fill, forcing the flood waters to rise even higher in the unfilled and less filled areas. Throw in the proven ability of global warming to cause “training” of rainstorms that clump together and saturate a small georgraphy, and who needs hurricanes? And speaking of hurricanes, gulf water temps are already unusually warm for this time of year.
So if you’re going to build something in south Florida, you need to have it on wheels and be ready to roll it outa there or build it like a brick outhouse, and even that might not survive. It’s notable that Collier County built a new Emergency Operations Center several mines inland, and it’s all concrete and steel with nothing important on the lower two floors and covers over it’s slit windows. That may not be enough, they just designated an “alternate EOC” several miles further inland.
So it would be unwise of me to make major investments in a 24 year old trailer that sits a foot off the slab when that slab is a couple feet below the hundred year flood plain. And while a two decade old park model can easily be written off and replaced with a new one that’s easier to evacuate, it’s even more iffy that the trailer park will survive and the utilities come back up- the electrical, water, and sewer are a couple feet under the slabs that are already a couple feet under the hundred year flood line.
So no, south Florida doesn’t sound like the kind of place I’d want to bring a decent car and TV and computers too so I could comfortably stay there for more than a month or two a winter. And Chris in his comments above is right- the only parts of Florida other than the national parks that ain’t been ruined is inland, and that’s where I’d buy if I’d move there for more than a month or two.
So Pat, yes, global warming may very well flood out south Florida… But it’ll probably be freshwater.
http://grist.org/cities/miami-sea-level-rise-climate-change/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/18/miami-flooding_n_4118528.html
http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/12/21/the-siege-of-miami
The problem isn’t that you can’t boost your trailer park 10 feet, and ride out most stuff, high and dry, it’s going to be all the infrastructure you need that they can’t raise 10 feet.
Grocery stores, gas stations, Electric transformers, water pumps, sewer lines, pharmacies….
if once every year you get three feet of water rolling around, what is going to happen?
Pat, as a true believer of every facet of climate change, you’re addicted to the koolaid!
I’ve read several of the articles predicting a swamped Miami, thanks to melting glacier fed rising seas. But the data says otherwise: The data for that location goes back for a century, and it’s a slow steady rise of inches per century, not your predicted logarithmic rise measured in whole meters per century.
You are correct that the infrastructure will go first. It’s already very expensive for Collier County to run water and sewer systems for 400,000 people- With a slope of a foot a mile or less, the entire sewer system requires electric pumps rather than the usual gravity to work. Then there’s a back up system of natural gas powered generators to power the pumps in the event of power failures, and a whole natural gas pipeline system to feed those backup generators. On the fresh water side, due to the shortage of fresh water there’s two pumped fresh water systems, the potable water system and a second system of recycled water from the treatment plant that’s used for irrigation. No wonder the County water and sewer system is one of the county’s largest employers, with a payroll of around 500!
There’s no pumped storm sewer system, just a bunch of ditches optimistically aimed at the ocean. So add a foot of hurricane delivered rain or just a mesosystem and everything that ain’t built up to the hundred year and maybe even 500 year flood elevations goes underwater for days. That takes down most of the PUDs sewer systems as well as parts of the public system they feed into, and where are you going to find 10,000 portable toilets? Then comes the mosquitos…
Sorry that doesn’t fit the environmentalist’s rising seas scenario, but it’s more likely.